Break So Soft (Break So Soft Duet Book 2) Page 26

  “Good,” she says haughtily, sounding every inch the Mistress for a moment. “Then take me to a room where we can play.”

  But if she’s letting me be dom for once, then my beast isn’t going to pass up a moment of it.

  Especially when a second later, I see the conflict enter her eyes again. She’s not just asking me to top her on a whim. For some reason, she doesn’t feel like she can be a good domme to me right now.

  I think back to our very first lesson, that day I took her to the club. The dominant/submissive relationship is about trust.

  I already know she’s not willing to trust me with all her problems. But every opportunity I can take to demonstrate that I won’t be like every other man in her life—that I’ll stay, that I’ll be someone she can actually count on, goddammit but I’m going to fight to prove myself to her.

  So I don’t wait for her to second guess her impulse. No, I grab her and throw her over my shoulder. When she shrieks, I smack her ass and the beast roars with approval.

  I carry her up to my playroom, shoving open the door so hard it bangs into the wall. I don’t care. I’m here to take what’s mine.

  I set her on her feet beside the large four poster bed the dominates the middle of the room. There’s some of the other usual equipment around the room but all I care about is the bed. The frame is solid oak and connected to each bedpost is a short coil of chain and a padded cuff.

  I’m about to order her on the bed when she snaps, “Strip and get on the bed.”

  My head snaps her direction but she’s only glaring me down.

  “You said I’m still the top,” she reminds me darkly.

  Yes. Fuck. It’s a line I’ve never straddled before. In this power exchange, I have to remember that she ultimately needs to feel safe. So I’ll do it her way.

  For now.

  Still, I can’t help my jaw tightening as I bow my head and tug off my shirt, pants, and boxers and climb up on the bed.

  Her eyes brighten. I think she likes the fact that submission is so difficult for me. I swear she revels in it.

  And somehow that thought makes me harder. Jesus, being with her is a mind-fuck sometimes. One I wouldn’t give up for the world.

  She comes to where I sit on the bed and grabs my left ankle. She’s sure to look me in the eye as she secures the cuff around it.

  What will she do next? I never know. I just know I want to be with her for it, every step of the damn way.

  She moves to my other ankle and secures the cuff around it as well. There’s only a tiny bit of slack in the chains. She’s got my legs forced open in an unnatural spread-eagled position and I have to force my breathing even.

  Do I love being tied to the bed in this position, my cock completely vulnerable?

  I can’t imagine any guy would.

  Still, I lean back on my elbows and meet Callie’s gaze. I won’t flinch or try to cover up. She’ll only know she can trust me if she sees I’m willing to afford her the same.

  She quickly averts her eyes though, dropping them to the floor as she yanks her sweater off, revealing a hot as fuck black lace bra. She shimmies out of her legging next and Jesus—she’s got a matching barely there lace thong that’s little more than a triangle of fabric covering her.

  My cock strains toward her and my legs flex uselessly. Obviously I can’t get to her, strapped down like I am. Well, she hasn’t restrained my wrists yet, but I force myself not to reach for her. No need to remind her of that fact.

  And thank Jesus, the next second she comes towards me, climbing up on the bed and then—

  Jesus fuck—

  She climbs up over my lap, bending over and arranging herself in spanking position. Her belly brushes the tip of my cock and I suck in a lungful of air at the contact.

  Yes. Jesus. Yes.

  I run a hand down her flank, stretching my jaw and reveling in the soft warmth of her skin. And then I swat her ass. Hard.

  She lets out a little yelp and I wait. Will she retreat? What’s it gonna be, baby?

  Is she going to keep trying to top from the bottom or will she really let me take the lead? I’ll do whatever she wants.

  Her body goes tense and for a second I think she’s going to run.

  But then she relaxes, forehead dropping to the bed, arching her back so that her ass rises up in the air toward my hand.

  That’s right, baby. That’s right.

  She arches her back so that her ass rises up in the air, taunting me.

  Oh baby. I don’t need an invitation. My hand falls again on that sweet, sweet ass. She grunts but keeps wiggling her backside at me.

  Is this a test of wills? Or is it like her fake smiles? Even here does she think she can put me in my place? Keep me behind glass so I can only look but not touch? Never really touch her? Never get to the real Calliope behind those walls she keeps so high around herself?

  Because she’s wrong. She’s dead wrong.

  She doesn’t know it, but she’s opened the gates the smallest bit and I’m going to do my damndest to ram my way in and bring light to the places she tries to keep hidden in darkness.

  I continue the spanking, concentrating harder than even when I was coding earlier. Not every blow is hard. Some are light smacks that end in caresses between her legs.

  Her attempts to excite and distract me by writhing in my lap aren’t going to work. Doesn’t she know by now how single-minded I can be when I have a goal?

  I rain down more punishing blows and finally, finally, she starts to go pliant under my hands. Her eyes flutter closed and her features go lax.

  I barely keep back the growl of satisfaction at the sight. Yes. Fuck yes. We’re getting somewhere now. Peeling back the layers of bullshit and digging down to her truths.

  Come on, Callie, baby. Give me your truth.

  I tease between her thighs after landing another smack but pull back just as quickly. She moans in denied satisfaction and I grip both her pink ass cheeks in my hands before landing another spanking.

  She’s doing so good. I can feel her letting go. Giving into me.

  And then all the sudden, it’s like a switch flips.

  She goes tense again beneath me. I don’t know what happened, but I’ve lost her. “Harder,” she says through a huffing breath. “And tell me what a bad girl I am. What a filthy, disgusting slut.”

  I recoil from her words. And then set about correcting her.

  “You’re my beautiful slut. Built so perfectly.” I land a resounding smack in the center of her ass, right where it’s pinkest.

  I’m getting her truths all right. But Jesus. Is that what she really thinks of herself?

  She twists, turning and glaring at me with a fury that goes beyond a little wordplay in a scene.

  “I’m a disgusting cum bucket. Worthless except for my tits and ass.”

  I meet her gaze calmly. “Your body is a work of art and deserves to be worshiped.”

  Her mouth goes tight and she looks like steam is about to come out her ears, she’s so pissed.

  “I’m a filthy lying bitch,” she growls, grinding herself down on my cock.

  Oh, baby.

  She’s so desperate for any shred of control but that’s not the way this game is played. Not tonight. Jesus, this has been a long time coming. This is what’s been hiding in her head the whole time?

  “Say it,” she spits. “Say I’m a dirty cunt.”

  I keep my hands on her ass and start to massage them. No more spanking tonight. No, it’ll all be about worship from here on out. “You’re gorgeous. You’re a goddess. You’re—”

  She leaps off of me. And before I can say another word, her hand comes flying at me and she slaps me hard across the face.

  “I’m a disgusting whore!” she shouts. “Say it. Fucking say it!”

  “Stiletto.”

  She freezes as I say the word. A second later she stumbles backward, a look of horror overtaking her face as she looks at me and down to her hand and then back to m
e like she’s just realizing what she did. How far she went.

  And then she looks like she’s about to bolt.

  But she takes a shuddering breath and comes back to the bed. She doesn’t say a word and she doesn’t look at me. She just begins uncuffing my left ankle. Her hands are trembling so badly, she can barely manage the buckle.

  “Callie,” I finally say gently as I bend to help her with the buckle.

  I see her cringe but I finally trust that she’s not going to run like a frightened animal. What I just witnessed—Jesus, finally, she finally let me in. She didn’t mean to, that much is obvious. But it’s part of what power exchange is about. Busting down barriers to intimacy.

  “Tell me what’s going on,” I demand. Then I soften my voice. “Please.”

  Please Callie. Let me all the way in.

  She looks lost in indecision. Actually, she looks tortured by it, her mind working a hundred miles an hour.

  She looks down but I don’t miss the tear that slides down her cheek. I reach over and catch it with my thumb, urging her face back toward me.

  When I do, her features are devastated.

  “Why wouldn’t you just say it?” There’s anguish, not accusation, in her voice. “You had no problem with the humiliation talk to the other sub. You encouraged me to use it.” She looks at me and swipes angrily as the tears continue to fall. She quickly glances away as she works to free my second ankle.

  “Vocal humiliation is a part of play because it’s taboo,” I explain, keeping my voice gentle. “Society says we’re not supposed to say those things out loud, so when we do it in play, it turns us on.”

  “Exactly,” she cuts in. “So why—”

  I’m already shaking my head. “But you,” I reach out and grab her hand. “I’m afraid you believe it about yourself. All those things you were saying. None of that’s true. I won’t say it to you.”

  She snatches her hand back and turns away from me.

  Her body language says back off but I’ve gotten this far and I’m going to press my advantage. “Bad things have happened to you in the past, haven’t they? You don’t have to tell me what,” I run a hand down her spine. “But you will allow me to help you through it. Now let’s stop flirting with this switch. You need me to be in control tonight. So let me take it.” My voice has the command of a dominant. “Get on the bed.”

  She could use her safe word right back and bring an end to this. I pray she won’t, though. Please, please, Callie. Be my brave girl.

  Her eyes dart every which way. And then she finally looks my way. “No bondage.”

  Just those two words and then her gaze drops to the floor.

  I nod. I’m fine with limits especially when it means she’s communicating with me. “On the bed.”

  Her chest moves up and down in clear anxiety, but she does as I ask. And I get it now. Why it thrills her so much to know that submission is difficult for me but that I do it anyway. It is more meaningful than if she just obeyed like a robot.

  Her submission in this moment means something.

  And I’m so damn proud of her. She has demons, it’s clear, and she’s facing them. With me. She’s allowing me in.

  I don’t waste another second. I get on the bed and pull her into my lap again. It’s a much more natural position now, though, without my legs spread awkwardly and cuffed to the bed.

  I rub my hand down her warm, pink ass.

  “Aw, there we are.” I can’t help the satisfaction that drips from my voice. “The most beautiful goddamn ass in all creation, made just for me.”

  I shift her and then lean over to kiss each of her sweet cheeks. I don’t stop there, though. I shift her even more on the bed so that she’s lying on her stomach and I drop to my knees. Her body jumps in shock when I begin tonguing the rim of her back entrance.

  “Shh,” I whisper, massaging her before delivering several stinging slaps again. Then I dive back in with my tongue, exploring her forbidden places.

  She makes little whimpering noises as I wrap an arm around her waist to hold her in place while I continue thrusting my tongue up inside the tight rosette of her ass.

  She shudders and writhes in my hold, like she’s not sure if she wants to pull away or push back against me. Which only makes me tongue her deeper. I want her to know that nothing is wrong here. Nothing is forbidden between us. To know that I’m going to become familiar with every single inch and crevice of her.

  I’m going to etch the memory of myself so deep in the very fabric of her body that she’ll never be able to get me out. My hands. My tongue. My fingers. My cock.

  I pull back from her ass only when her legs begin shaking. I grin when I see her pussy glistening with wetness.

  “Look at this pretty, pretty cunt. You’re juicing for me, aren’t you, beautiful dirty girl?” I gather the moisture with my fingers, dipping them inside her pussy, rolling in a circle and then pulling back out. Then I drag my fingers teasingly, ever so teasingly back to her ass.

  But, always wanting to keep her on her toes, then I deliver another stinging series of slaps.

  I’m not spanking hard. It’s more about sensation. And domination.

  Her back arches in pleasure and Jesus, I don’t know how much longer I can hold out. I reach down and squeeze the tip of my cock. Not yet.

  I stand up and slide her more fully onto the bed, urging her up on her hands and knees. Then I lay down on the bed between her spread knees on my back and lift up, at the same time dragging her hips down until she’s sitting on my face.

  Oh fuck. Her scent. I seek out her clit and give a hard suck while I slip my finger inside her. I want to eat her out everywhere at once but before I move on, I tease the edge of my teeth along her clit.

  She cries out and her stomach tenses, whole body jolting.

  Jesus, she’s at my mercy. I’ve got her right on the edge.

  I grin and slide the finger I had inside her out and back toward her ass. I want her blind with sensory overload before I start questioning her again about what’s going on. I want her stripped of all inhibitions so that she gives me the truth.

  But as my forefinger starts to gently explore her back channel and I lap at her cunt for several more long moments to make absolutely sure she’s lost in pleasure, I realize that—dammit. I’ve lost her.

  Her moans and little gasps of pleasure have disappeared completely.

  She hovers above me, all but frozen except for her hips that move restlessly back and forth against my face.

  “Callie?” I say and she doesn’t respond. “Callie, do you want to use your safeword?”

  No response. Okay, so maybe she’s embarrassed about liking ass play. Some women are and that’s fine. I’ll get her used to every sensation there is in the book.

  My forefinger slipped up her ass easily and I slowly work in a second beside the first. She continues thrusting against my face so I take that as a sign she wants to keep going. I want her to know what it feels like to be absolutely devoured, worshiped in every sense of the word.

  Her odd silence continues only another few seconds before she cries, “Oh God, Jackson.”

  When I tilt my head slightly, I can see her looking down at me. Then a shudder moves down her body, her legs trembling so violently the bed is shaking.

  Oh she’s close. She’s soooo close.

  And she’s the most goddamned beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed in my life.

  She’s here, fully with me. And maybe for today that’s enough. I don’t need to know all her secrets for us to be as connected as two people can be. She’ll tell me in time. Right now, this is enough. She trusts me with her body and I have to believe that it will eventually translate to trust in every other part of her life.

  She mutters something unintelligible and then lifts all the way up to her knees, away from my mouth. Then she crawls down my body, straddling me and burying her face in my neck, inhaling.

  Then— oh Jesus.

  She’s got my cock in
hand and is guiding me inside her.

  So tight. So fucking perfect. So tight. I’m thrusting because I can’t not. It’s Callie. Perfect Callie’s pussy. Oh Jesus.

  But no, dammit. I hiss through my teeth as she fully seats herself on top of me. I’m not ready to give up control yet so I grab her legs and then I sit up, my legs to the floor so she’s not so much riding me as we’re both equal partners in this.

  She locks her legs around her back, squeezing me to her with everything she’s got and damn if being wrapped up in her isn’t the best thing I’ve ever felt in my whole life.

  “Fuuuuck,” I groan, feeling my eyes roll back in my head. Still, it’s not enough. I tangle my hand in the hair at the back of her neck and drag her to me, crushing my mouth to hers.

  She cries out into my mouth, kissing me back just as hungrily and squeezing her walls around my cock. Oh fuck. Oh fuck she’s the best thing I’ve ever—

  I grip her hips to maneuver her up and down on my cock, fucking her with a tortuously slow rhythm. As much as I want to hammer her into next Tuesday, I want to savor this even fucking more.

  And I want her to know that there’s no part of her I won’t be demanding, so I spit on my fingers and then stretch one hand back around to that sweet little puckered asshole of hers.

  “Let me in, baby. Let me in. I want in everywhere. I want every filthy beautiful fucking part of you.”

  She shudders and buries her face in my neck again, breathing me in as I push two fingers in. I continue, relentlessly, in and out while she gloves me so tight. So tight, Jesus, so—

  She whines and bites my shoulder hard.

  “That’s right. Let me know it. Give it to me. Give it all up to me.”

  Her nails dig into my back as she moves her hips back and forth, her whine growing higher pitched, more and more uncontrolled sounding.

  “It’s just you and me here. But I want everything. Everything,” I demand, adding a third finger.

  Does she feel me? Does she fucking feel me? Everywhere? I want to be her fucking everything. Goddammit just let me, Callie. Let me in.

  I shift slightly and my cock angles, hitting even deeper inside her and she grinds against me and oh fuck—

  “Jackson!” she screams, clutching me with every part of her body, her pussy contracting on my cock in a way that—